Episode 39: Comparison is the Thief of Joy

Envy and comparison are common struggles, especially in the art world and among creative entrepreneurs. Comparison can quickly infiltrate your life and rob you of joy. In this episode, I address the topic of comparison, acknowledging its difficulty and the negative impact it can have.

Comparison Reveals Our True Desires
Think back to the last time you felt the sting of comparison. Remember the emotions that accompanied it—the envy, the feeling of unworthiness, and the questioning of your skills and opportunities. Comparison has a way of unraveling our achievements and making us doubt ourselves. But here's an interesting twist: comparison actually reveals our deepest desires. It shows us what we truly want in our lives. For example, if you find yourself comparing to others in the educational and speaking space, it's a sign that you crave those same opportunities. So, while comparison may be ugly, it uncovers our aspirations.

Knowing Our Triggers
Understanding our triggers is crucial in tackling comparison. By identifying when we typically fall into the comparison trap—before or after a launch, when sharing artwork, during collection development, after success or failure, at specific times of the day or month—we gain valuable insight. Identifying the sources of comparison is crucial—be it Instagram, Pinterest, specific friends, online communities, or other platforms. Once you know where it's coming from, you can create a game plan. Being aware of our comparison triggers allows us to develop strategies and tools to overcome them, leading to personal growth and enlightenment.

Creating a Game Plan
Let's delve into implementing tools and strategies to combat comparison. Here are some ideas to help you develop that plan. First, anticipate and recognize when comparison is likely to occur.

Limit your social media usage and be mindful of the content you consume. Muting accounts that consistently trigger comparison can be helpful. It's not about unfollowing, but rather reducing your exposure to their content. While this may not be a long-term solution, it can be helpful if you find yourself frequently struggling with a particular person or brand.

When you find yourself caught in the trap of comparison, turn it into a celebration and inspiration moment. Instead of feeling envious when someone achieves something you desire, shift your mindset and genuinely celebrate their success. Avoid being the person who others feel hesitant to share their wins with because they fear your disappointment. Recognize that having friends who are steps ahead of you can be inspiring, as it shows you that those opportunities are within reach.

Compete against yourself by focusing on your own goals and progress, which allows comparison to fade away. Reflecting on your past achievements and growth can provide a powerful reminder of how far you've come.

Celebrate yourself intentionally and cultivate gratitude by appreciating what you have in the present moment. Gratitude acts as a lens that brings clarity and aligns you with the things you value. If it's challenging to celebrate yourself, seek external validation from a trusted person who can mirror your strengths and achievements.

Remember that what you observe externally doesn't reveal the full picture of someone's journey. Behind every success, there are struggles, fears, and unseen efforts. Avoid comparing your inner struggles to someone else's external display. By acknowledging the hidden aspects, you can stay grounded and maintain a healthier perspective.

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Comparison has a way of sneaking into our lives and slowly opens the doors to: jealousy, frustration, anger, hopelessness, lack of inspiration, anxiety, feeling behind or stuck, low self esteem and unworthiness

• Comparison, is at its peak, informs us of what we truly desire in our lives.

• If we are aware of what brings on or triggers comparison in out life, we are able to create a game plan and put some some tools in place.

• Be aware of when you find yourself in the comparison trap and what is the source.

• Here are some tools to help with comparison:
  -limit social media and be aware of what you are consuming
  -mute accounts that you follow on instagram that you just can't seem to quite shake comparison with yet. 
  -Turn your comparison moment into a celebration and inspiration moment.
  -Only compete against yourself and get really focused on your own goals
  -Go down memory lane, and to look at your past and how far you've come.
  -Celebrate yourself with intention
  -Have a gratitude journal and be happy for what you have in your current moment
  -Have someone “hold the mirror up to you” show you things about yourself that you can’t see
  - “Don’t compare your inside to someone else’s outside”
  
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